Joy in the workplace. Joy in the job searching. Joy as a missionary. Joy as a barista. Joy as a mother. Joy as a single. Joy as a wife. 

Joy that I belong to Jesus. Joy that I am His child and anything I can do can be most radiant under His sovereign hand.

So teach us to number our days, that we may present to You a heart of wisdom.-Psalm 90:12

You are never too young to think about getting old. Or at least this is what I hold to. We are all dying every day. You are the youngest you will ever be at this moment, but you are also the oldest you have ever been. 

Sometimes I wonder how we would view age if we kept track of the number of days we have been alive, rather than the years. Would we feel our transience a little bit more, or would would the days get buried in the abundance of trailing numbers? 

On June first I turned twenty-four. I'm not going to crack jokes, trying to take hold of the privileges of a higher number while maintaining the benefits of being "young". But I do want to grow in the wisdom that comes from God, and I do want to take hold of that wisdom through processing life as it comes. None of us, no matter our number of gray hairs, will ever "arrive" this side of Heaven. I may not have the benefit of a large breadth of experiences, but I don't want to miss out on gleaning from the ones that I have. Give me a small library to be well-versed in over Powell's books barely scanned any day.*

I am "young", but I am also older than I was before. My body is breaking down--slowly, to be sure, but  it has settled upon being chiseled by the crashing waves as I pass through the waters. My outer person is wasting away with the hours, but my inner self is being renewed day by day to look like Jesus. The world is dressing me down, tearing at my dress like Cinderella's jealous stepsisters, but the Father is dressing me up in a wedding gown. Sin and death scratch their claws over our skin, but there is a transformation taking place that neither have power to reverse. In Christ, death dies. In Christ, the dead are brought to life.

That is something to look forward to.











*No offense to Powell's and their fans. I know that if I ever get to visit Portland one day I will get woozy at the sight of all of those books.

 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who 

comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the 

comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For just as the sufferings of Christ are ours in 

abundance, so also our comfort is abundant through Christ.

-2 Cor. 1:3-5

That the aches and groans rising from my soul now can one day become the balm for another's soul is a source of great joy for me. It is this that causes me to eye the thorn so stubbornly embedded under layers of skin with a greater understanding when my Maker refuses to remove it, the red haloed thing that it is. It teaches me that my wisdom has a limit, that my perception's strength is finitely numbered. The glory of God may flash forth with greater brilliance when I run with a limp, my crooked steps may take on more of a dance. 

How can I know which would be better, with or without?
I have come to see that my joy may run deeper in the waters I would never ask to swim in. 

A Rough Draft of my "30 by 30" list. I have six years to complete the list, so I should be able to accomplish nearly all of them if not all, right?

1) Make a terrarium
2) Make a fermented drink (besides kombucha) (Completed June 2014)
3) Plant a vegetable/herb garden
4) Learn to play another instrument: piano, violin, banjo, mandolin, etc.
5) Make homemade cheese
6) Learn an art form: watercolor, tap dance, painting, sculpting, etc.
7) Spend 6-12 months reviewing journals and reflecting and praying on them
8) Go to a foreign food festival
9) Write one blog entry a month for a year
10) Spend 6 months journaling daily
11) Pray through Valley of Vision
12) Read 2 Russian novels
13) Study feministic lit--Feminine Mystique, Simone B., etc.
14) Participate in a book club (completing July 2014)
15) Read two books by a Puritan or some other historical Reformed figure (Calvin's Institutes?)
16) Read two philosophy books (not surveys)
17) Make/wear a flower crown
18) Read 2 whole epic/long poems: Odyssey, Dante, Faerie Queen, Paradise Lost, etc.
19) Spend at least 1 year memorizing scripture
20) Visit a meadow in Springtime
21) Spend one month focusing on prayer for the nations
22) Spend one month focusing on prayer for my family
23) Spend one month focusing on prayer for my neighbors and co-workers
24) Spend one month focusing on prayer for my church
25) Spend one month focusing on prayer for gospel opportunities
26) Spend one month focusing on prayer for friends
27) Spend one month focusing on thinking through and praising God for the gospel
28) Spend one month praying through the Psalms
29) Read a book or listen to lectures on a less familiar subject outside of the Humanities
30) Spend some time with an elderly person and ask them questions

                           For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things.-Romans 11:36

I'm setting out on a conceptual journey of sorts. It isn't really anything new--my mind is constantly a rabbit-trail traveler from the task at hand. I have a large bag full of ideas and truths and observations that  I consistently pull out of my bag, probing deeper and testing to see if new objects will fit alongside of them.  I always ask more questions than I can answer. I always examine a thing to death.

Making discoveries during this process, however, is exhilarating. Finding wisdom and insight is better than striking gold. I'm more curious than a kitten. There are things I know are true, so I set out. There are things I sense are true, so I probe and test and cut into the flesh of the thing. I will never know anything completely, but to gain a new insight is a delight. In my limited wisdom, I lean upon the One who knows all, understands all, created all. From His mouth come wisdom and understanding, and nothing is hidden from His sight. 

In the beginning, God made all things. Man was His last creation, created in His image--both male and female. He brought the woman to the man, and God created the first marriage between them, and told them to "be fruitful" and "multiply". It's the love story most of us know, the details by which we often study to seek to understand what it means to be "male", "female", "married" and "human". But for all that we can learn in the grand entrance, I find myself asking questions about previous teaching on these topics:

 When God said it wasn't "good for Adam to be alone", was He referring exclusively to the necessity of marriage for all men? 

What does it mean to be a woman? What distinguishes her from men, all biological differences aside? 

Can I only express my "femininity" if I am married? 

Is femininity irrelevant if I never do get married?

These questions--among others--have moved me to search deeper to find truth that could change the way I live and the way I relate to others. I have been moved to ask friends questions, to search out the pages of scripture and other books, to pray and journal. This is one of my journeys I am setting out upon right now. I would love to invite you alongside me.

I face the temptation to demonize and/or reject something that's good simply because it has been misused and idolized. I can grow frustrated, banning all cuttery because they have been used as weapons in the past. Yes, expose and reject the long sad history of fork-induced casualties, but do not padlock the utensil drawer. There's no need to switch over to chopsticks.

Basic Principles of Counseling

--"How can  even this situation prove redemptive?"
If I never lose hope in Christ's gracious control and redemptive agenda, I will be able to communicate the same to those I counsel.

--"Most people don't know that their biggest problem is not 'out there' in the world; it's 'in here' in their own heart."
Always move the agenda toward the person sitting in front of me.

--"Love. Know. Speak. Do."
 Counselors care, probe, speak Ephesians 4:15 and 4:29 truth, and help people make concrete changes. Am I covering all the bases? Am I on the right base now?

--"Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father" (Col. 3:17).
 I am a servant called to be a  faithful and full of faith, not a technician called to fix things.

--"Get to specifics. After all the talking is done, what are you going to do about your watershed issue this week?" 
Change happens in the details, in the step-step-step of your walk. Effective counseling moves towards substantive change.

--"This life, therefore, is not righteousness but growth in righteousness... We are not yet what we shall be, but we are growing toward it."
As this quote from Luther attests, small changes accumulate; a glimpse of final glory.

--"Counseling--no magic, no technique, no sure cure."
Biblical counseling is simply the way of speaking wisely with moral decision-makers who will trust and obey either lies or truth.

---David Powilson, from his book "Speaking Truth in Love"